I do think you might have gotten a rather skewed view of the situation in the US. In the ten years I've been working professionally I've never had to work weekends, for example, and I currently have 30 days of vacation (plus another eight or so sick days). I realize the amount of vacation I get is unusually high, but I think three or four weeks is normal.
That said, while I am reasonably well compensated I don't make enough to retire early. At my current trajectory I'm not sure I make enough to retire full stop ... so I might just be working until I die after all.
I can retire around 50, where I now live in Scandinavia/Norway. But that comes down to me currently living in a low cost of living area - my house is basically worth 10% of those in major cities. But I also don't have to think about stuff like healthcare, which is a big plus when it's time to retire.
Can the average US tech worker take 3+ week long holidays every year (which are great for disconnecting), like clockwork? I highly doubt that, I've seen it in several American companies, where most of my US colleagues would basically only get what I'd call "bird droppings": 1-2-3-5 days here and there.
Even though on paper the average tech worker might have 20+ days off, if the culture is not there, peer pressure will kind of force you to compromise in other ways.
That said, while I am reasonably well compensated I don't make enough to retire early. At my current trajectory I'm not sure I make enough to retire full stop ... so I might just be working until I die after all.