You're a king? So you live in a mansion?

I live in the midwest, wife doesn't work, 10 years experience - we live in a 4k sqft house in the best school district in the state about 25 minutes from the city. How much does that cost in SV?

Yep, I'm a king. I don't live in a mansion, but I don't need one. My wife works because she wants to. My kids go to a wonderful school 2 minutes from our house. I commute 25 minutes into SF (worst part of my day, BART is seriously crowded). I make a fairly absurd amount of money (it's embarrassing to say, and I don't need the hassle of having it out there, but let's just say that I hit 6 figures many years ago). We spend well under half that, and we have enough saved that we can retire anywhere in the world tomorrow if we want. I _am_ older than you, but what people are saying is true, after 25 years working as a developer in the Bay Area, I am making money hand over fist and the only place that can compete compensation-wise is NYC -- and honestly you couldn't pay me enough to live there.

agreed, you can have better toys if you live elsewhere (though probably not near the ocean).

It’d be good also if these salary surveys were after taxes. Be interesting to compare that.

In the city... 10k + a month in rent alone... 25 minutes out 5-6k a month in rent alone

Keep in mind 25 minutes out can easily turn into 1 hour or more.

In SF, I have a 250 square feet studio with no kitchen & I pay $1550/month in a cheaper part of town (the Tenderloin).

This is my situation. I’ve become emotionally attached to my wife and kids, and they are emotionally attached to our mcmansion and spending their afternoons at the country club pool.

I would have to be a billionaire to maintain our midwest lifestyle in California.

How much is it going to cost you when XX years from now you have half the savings of a SV engineer plus your house?

If he owns his house, he doesn't need more because his main living expense is paid for.

The engineer can buy a similar house and still have significantly more retirement savings.

4k sqft 25 minutes from mountain view is probably a cool three million at least. Otoh I have saved four and a half million over the last ten years as a simple non-workaholic individual contributor at one of the big cos. So maybe it's ok?

Yeah, RE appreciation probably has paid out way more than salary in the valley. At least to the avg engineer. Stock options have done well too, but that’s more like top 1%

do you have to commute an hour a day?

I'm not from silicon valley but priorities vary a lot from person to person. I value shortest possible commute time much higher than an extra ~2500 square feet I don't need.

I hope you're not implying that the typical commute for someone in the city is less [edit] than 25 minutes. http://kron4.com/2017/10/30/study-san-francisco-ranks-among-...

No idea what stats show, but I can tell you personally that I have a 20 minute round trip commute daily and wouldn't have it any other way (except shorter if possible)

I could handle living in an apartment and retiring to a cheaper city at 45.

Yep; lived in the Bay for 3 years, and then now in Portland. I've not even come close to what I was making there. They just don't do equity here, and that puts you way the hell behind.

Until you have kids

My wife and two kids and I didn't start getting ahead of our debt until we moved out here.

On a single income or double income ? I can see double incomes getting ahead of the cost of living.